WELCOME TO MY AUTHOR PORTFOLIO
This month we’ll be discussing ants, those tiny little workaholics. Ants are found on every continent except Antarctica (ironically). There are thousands of species, from invasive fire ants to the amazing leaf-cutter ants of Latin America. Almost all ants are females, with males kept around only for reproductive purposes, after which they die. Many ants prefer the names Thelma and Louise (reference: “The Sisterhood of the Traveling Ants”).
Anteaters are the bane of the ant and the termite. Anteaters are in the order Pilosa along with sloths. They are in the suborder Vermilingua which means “worm-tongued.” Anteaters have two natural predators—pumas and jaguars. However, we do not refer to pumas and jaguars as “anteater-eaters.”
Besides anteaters, humans are a signific-ant predator, and it’s not just Orkin and Terminix. Some tout ants as a protein-rich snack, such as Ento Foods’ Gourmet Black Ants “serve chilled, alone or on crackers.” In Colombia, leafcutter ants (big-bottom ants) are eaten fried or baked with a pinch of salt, called hormigas culonas.
Atom Ant premiered in 1965, sharing a cartoon feature with Secret Squirrel. Atom Ant derived his power from atomic energy as stated in the theme song “that tiny ant and his atomic power has what it takes to make the vilest villain cower.”
Ant-Man, a Marvel comics superhero flick was released in 2015. It was considered for production back in the 1990s, but Disney released “Honey, I Shrank the Kids” which was believed to be too similar a concept. To prepare for his role as Ant-Man, Paul Rudd had to cut carbs, fried foods, and “basically ate nothing for a year.” So no fried ants or, especially, chocolate covered ants, for Mr. Rudd.
PUBLISHED STORIES AND ESSAYS
OTHER PUBLISHED STORIES... AND ESSAYS
How To Eat Right
How To Manage Your Money
How To Stay Healthy
The Fall Of Squirrel
Cake Walk
Do-gooders Gotta Eat Too
Of Peas and Queues
Three O'clock in the Garden of Good and Evil
News Item
The Visitor
Mr. Blinkie To The Rescue
The Point System
Elements Of Success
She Spits to Conquer
The Tree Remembers
Christmas Time Is Here
The Sodfather
What MLK Day Means To Me
Thanks, Mussolini
The Cure
Tarzan In Decline
Side Effects
Greatest Of All Time
The Last Hundred Days
AWARDS AND HONORS
2017 Pushcart Prize nomination from Hawaii Pacific Review for The Last Hundred Days
2018 First Honorable Mention Short Story Division AWC contest
2018 Second Place Chattahoochee Valley Contest Short Story category
2019 First Place Flash Fiction Division AWC contest
2020 First Place Essay Streetlight Magazine
2020 Top ten finalist for The Opossum Prize
2020 Honorable Mention Stories That Need To Be Told Anthology
2020 First place Flash Fiction category in Seven Hills contest
2021 Second place Streetlight Magazine's Flash fiction contest
2021 Second place Seven Hills contest for flash fiction
2021 Second place Seven Hills contest for essay/memoir
2021 Third place Seven Hills contest for non-fiction
"Life is a moderately good play with a poorly written third act."
Truman Capote
"Writers aren't people exactly. Or, if they're any good, they're a whole lot of people trying so hard to be one person."
F. Scott Fitzgerald
CURRENTLY READING
...or just finished
Galapagos by Kurt Vonnegut
Schultz by David Michaelis
Jim Henson by Brian Jay Jones
Acknowledgments: Photos of Stonehenge courtesy of Trevor S. Key from our trip to England in 2015. Photos of ball pit courtesy of Amelia C. Key from our trip to NYC in 2019.
